A hard fact of life is that relationships can break down. Most lesbians go through such an experience at least once, and sadly you’ve found yourself in this painful situation. Even though you’ve been dumped, you still care about your ex. Things may look bad, but there is still hope for your relationship if you take the right steps. Here are three critical things you must do if you want to get your ex-girlfriend back.
1. Keep your mouth shut. If there is to be any chance of reconciliation, you must watch your tongue and not speak poorly of your ex-girlfriend to other people. The lesbian community can be small and intertwined. Realize that you just never know who is friends with whom. Anything negative you say about your ex-lover has the potential to get back to her. Gossip spreads quickly!
Reserve your emotional venting for only your very closest friends – people you can absolutely trust to keep your secrets private. With anyone else, be diplomatic and vague about the details of your breakup. Resist the temptation to spill out your sadness and anger to anyone within six feet. Although your listeners may appear sympathetic, complaining about terrible your ex-girlfriend is doesn’t make you look very good either. Don’t say anything that could damage your lover’s reputation. Be pleasant to her friends if you run into them, and don’t ask mutual friends to take sides in the battle. Conduct yourself with class and you will have a better chance of making up with your ex-girlfriend.
2. Avoid places where she is likely to go – temporarily. Depending on your circumstances, this can be difficult, especially if you liked to go out to clubs together or you shared hobbies and activities. You might think it’s not fair to have to change your routines. But staying away from your ex as much as practical serves several purposes.
If you are feeling hurt and angry, seeing her could set off a storm of emotions and lead you to do or say something you’ll regret. The last thing you want is to make a bad situation worse, right? Minimizing contact also gives your ex a chance to feel your absence and even start missing you.
3. Make a plan for getting your ex back. Although you may feel hopeless right now, all is not lost. Many lesbians are able to make up after a separation. Just stay calm and think things through. Believe it or not, there are whole books written on the very topic of winning back your ex-lover. Getting back with an ex is basically a matter of using the right psychological tools in the right order.
Most importantly, having a strategy will help clear your head and make you feel more positive about the future. And that will definitely set you on the right path to a potential reconciliation with the woman you still care about.